I'd Go Anywhere For You

You are my fire...the one desire.

-sabi ko sa Backstreet Boys in Manila ticket 

OH YAAAAAASSSS!

I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS FOR THE LONGEST TIME. HUHUHUHU. Panic ensued when I couldn't access the SM Tickets website last night. I almost teared up while buying these tickets a while ago and the ticket lady at SM had to comment while stifling a laugh "Favorite mo pala talaga sila ma'am." I never knew that this moment would come that I'd get to see all five of them. And that's why it has to have a separate post. Haha. 

I think I have to prepare 100 rolls of tissue paper because I'm about to tear up because of the extreme Backstreet Boys splendor on May 5. 

26 Things I've Learned and Realized From My 26 Years Of Existence (Part Two)

I had a major "epiphany surge" during the past few weeks and I failed to write it down. As you may know, my memory is as rusty as an iron nail that was exposed to air moisture. But after aggressive extrication from my subconscious, here is the other half of the "26 Bullcrap Things I've Learned and Realized From My 26 Years Of Existence", as promised from my previous post.

1. Do things for yourself...not for other people - There is nothing more satisfying than doing something that you are very passionate about.
2. Learn to make decisions on your own - I've seen patients in the OB ER in their mid to late 20's who are still not able to decide on their own. That's when I realized that at the moment that your parents allowed you to have a taste of freedom, grab it and learn to decide for yourself. You may also ask for guidance from your parents and friends so at the end of the day, you learn how to take risks.
3. Even after giving things a careful thought before doing it, shit happens once you've done it - I know most of you already figured this out for yourselves but it's a different thing when it involves a life-changing decision. Since that will define the next few days, months or even years of your life, careful thinking is warranted. Despite that, there may be instances that things don't always work out to your advantage. Don't worry, it's fine! It isn't your fault that things aren't always what they seem to be. Even if it will turn out to be catastrophic in some point, always remember: this too, shall pass. Which brings me to the next item...
4. Forgive yourself for your mistakes and learn from it - There is no point in wallowing in self-pity after making an epic fail of a decision. This is what you call a *lapse of judgment and it happens even to very careful people. As Jess and Erick always tells me if ever I start to whine about my recent major lapse of judgment: learn from it and charge it to experience. That's what I did and now I'd like to believe that I'm stronger and wiser after that. Rise from the ashes, you little phoenix, you!
5. Set standards accordingly - Never set standards that are unrealistically high or too low. You'll end up with nothing if your set the bar too high and if you set it too low, you'll get a really bad headache. I've had an experience that I lowered my standards a bit and I ended up with a total douche. Trust me on this one, you get what you settle for.
6. If you want to be treated well, then demand it - People get treated in the way they want to be. I'm not talking about barking orders like an obnoxious asshole. You have to do it in such a way that you have to assert yourself that you don't want to be treated like crap. Don't settle for nonsense. If you allow people to walk all over you, then that's how it's going to be.
7. It's okay to be not in a relationship at this point - Just because everyone around me is getting engaged and married doesn't mean that I should scour the world for "The One" and marry him right on the spot. Because if I do, chances are my standards would be messed up and I may end up with a total douche who exhibits all of these characteristics. Again. See #5. And besides, I have always believed in the notion that "Love Finds You"...because right now, I must be Waldo. Lol.
8. It's better to have loved and lost than to live with a douchebag for the rest of your life - Seriously. In my experience, this item is numbers 3-7 combined. Hahaha! But really, who would want to endure a lifetime of douchebaggery? It's good while it lasts, at least you know that you're human because you're capable of the "feels". Just remember you should be treated like a queen and you don't deserve anything less than that.
9. Always have a "Me Time" - Give yourself some love and allot time to pamper yourself. You have been working hard and you deserve it. And don't forget those medical check-ups. RuPaul always says 'If you don't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?'
10. Doing something good for others because you want to is very fulfilling - Enough said.
11. You can't always get what you want - Teenage Dream. OHGAHD! I think it's a cosmic joke that the thing you want the most is usually the thing that you cannot have. I have learned to live with it that's why even if I know what I want, I prepare a Plan B just in case my original plan does not work out. I just relish the thought that even if I cannot get it, I know what I want. If there's one thing I can't stand is not knowing what I want...it freaks me out.
12. When someone tries to piss you off, just smile - Not the genuine kind of smile but the kind of smile that says, "Not today, bitch!" It avoids unnecessary drama and it maintains peace. Sometimes it's better to choose your battles and dealing with idiots isn't supposed to be one of them.
13. People talk and you can't make them shut up - That's okay as long as you don't change yourself into someone that is acceptable by their standards.

So that's it. I'll also make a mental note to write down the next batch of life lessons and whatnot the next time I have this "epiphany surge". I hope you picked out something from this too. Remember, it's a PSYCHO thing. Mrhrhr.

I love merengue. Psychos love merengue.

* Thank you Freyja, for coining this term. This is officially my favorite phrase of the year. Haha.

26 Things I've Learned and Realized From My 26 Years Of Existence (Part One)

The year 1986 has been very eventful because a lot of things happened during that time like President Nixon's resignation, Snap Elections, and the EDSA People Power Revolution. But there's one thing that happened that is known to many but of least significance to popular culture: I was born.

An old photo of me, circa 1988

Growing up, I was practically a wallflower. Although I have friends, I find solace in being alone because that's where I get to think things over and look into things in another perspective. Well, it's a PSYCHO thing. Lelsss.

So in celebration of the 27th year of my existence, I would like to share with all of you 13 out of the 26 things I've learned and realized from the past years about myself and life in general.

1. I have slowly come into terms that I will never be stick thin - Well, that's the way genetics goes. Fat or not, I know I'm awesome. And so are you.
2. It's okay to say NO once in a while - You don't have to say yes to everything that is being offered to you. Hey, it's okay to refuse. But of course you have to think about it before you do, especially if it is life-changing, career-defining or whatever. Just think: You can't give away something if you don't have it in you.
3. Being a good physician is also about good work ethics and a high quality output - I've learned this from Dr. Joma Bravo, a neurosurgery rotator from Makati Med. When I was assisting in one of his surgeries, he kept telling me that aside from theoretical knowledge, a good work ethic and a high quality output is important because it helps you accomplish more things, hence it'll enrich you more.
4. High school drama never ends - Making a huge deal out of small things isn't the way to go. Well, it's okay if you're in high school because it's a phase wherein you're full of angst and you're at the peak of being rebellious. But if you're in your 20's, utang na loob naman! Wag nang palakihin ang maliit na bagay. Sometimes I'm guilty of that but I realized that I have to learn to control my emotions and I have to learn other ways to adapt. Which brings us to numbers 5 to 8.
5. It's all about respect - No matter how much you loathe a person or how crappy a person treats you, you still have to show them and treat them with respect. Although it's cliché, you should not allow them to drag you down to their level.
6. Let go of the people or things that makes you feel bad about yourself - If you think you are in company of someone who puts you down or surrounded by something that makes you go on self-deprecation, it might be better to give yourself a break by letting go of them. You are not worthy of that. L'Oreal does not keep on saying this for nothing: because you're worth it.
7. Talk things out - I believe in diplomacy and that things could be straightened out if you keep an open mind, listen, and then get your point across. If they refuse to budge and still keep on yakking, it's not your problem anymore. Just think that they need to read something thicker than a magazine in order for them to expand their horizons.
8. Learn to ignore - There are times that I seriously want to punch annoying people in the face but of course, I know better. Sometimes what they do is just a way to scream for attention and you don't want to give them the satisfaction by giving them just that. Choosing to ignore them is the best way out, because it's a form of preemptive supalpal and it'll do wonders for your patience too. Hrhr.
9. Back yourself up with evidence - When making accusations, it is imperative that you do not base it on assumptions but on solid facts. While your assumptions may be true to you, it does not always hold true for everyone else. It's an entirely different thing if you drop names based on the premise of your assumption because once you're proven otherwise, you'll look like a dumbass and it gives me the liberty to laugh at you for your epic dumbassery (like that's even a word. LOL).
10. Traveling is fun - Self explanatory. But let me add up that aside from the fun factor, it also teaches me a lot of things that I did not learn in school. Make your trips more worthwhile by immersing in the local culture and observing their traditions.
11. Stop. Breathe. Think. - Sometimes I find myself doing things that I am completely unsure of or that I have gotten tired of. If ever I feel lost or have no clue at all, I stop whatever I'm doing, take a moment to rest then after which, I think of my purpose of being there and my goals. After mulling about those things, I'm good to go. In this fast paced life, sometimes we lose sight of our goals and purpose that's why we also need to do a little perspective check once in a while.
12. Nakakagwapo kapag mabango ang lalaki - I recently realized that I like guys who smell good. Koya kahit di ka mala-Adonis, instant pogi points kung mabango ka. Isang malaking "Hello, Koya" ito! Eyeloveyou. Lels. 
13. I am yearning to become financially independent - As an extended adolescent, it burns when I see friends and classmates who are already providing for their families in their own small ways. And as for me, I'm still siphoning money off my dad. Minsan nahihiya na akong humingi kasi ang tanda ko na, di pa rin ako kumikita! Haha. I know daddy understands but he's getting old and he should've had built an even bigger nest egg if it weren't for me. That's why I want to be financially independent, so that I won't ask for money anymore (except in major life changing decision-related events like moving to a different country).

Pretty nifty, eh? Stay tuned for the part 2 of this list on my next post. 

Dati-rati

Whoever said that OPM is dead, sure does not know what they're saying. There are a lot of great songs by Filipino composers that are hitting the airwaves. Take this ultracute example, "Dati" written by Thyro Alfaro and Yumi Lacsamana for the 2013 Philippine Popular Music Festival. The song was given justice by Sam Concepcion, Tippy Dos Santos and Quest.

In a shitty day, all I need is to play a feel good tune to chase the blues away. This song will do just that because it reminds so much of how simple things had been and the friendships that you made when you were a child. From Nintendo to Sarah ang Munting Prinsesa, this song has got all the elements of the 90's. Because yeah, you can take me out of the 90's but you can't take the 90's out of me. Songs don't have to be all about boobs, butts and booze. The simplicity of it all makes it tick.

Expect me to play this song over and over again until I start to get tired. Tee-hee!

Insomnia + Boyband Videos on YouTube = Nostalgia

A few nights ago, I couldn't sleep for no apparent reason. Giving up my lame attempt to get some sleep, I had this sudden urge to watch music videos of boybands from the 90's. I'm a 90's kid and I love boybands so I had a kick out of watching because every video brings back the bittersweet memories of my childhood, early adolescence and mid adolescence. Before I start pointing out the appropriate developmental task by Erik Erikson per stage, let me share my top five favorite videos I watched the other night:

 5. Code Red - What Good Is A Heart

Well, what can I say? One pretty boy, CHECK. That random guy who never gets to sing the lead, CHECK. Cheesy dance moves, CHECK. This video comes in complete in the boyband requirement even if they have four members only (standard is 5 members). It's nostalgic because as a high school freshman transferee at that time, coming from a very strict school, I don't get to see something as golden as high school senior dudes dancing to this in the exact choreography of this song.

 4. 911- How Do You Want Me To Love You

This song comes off from the band's second album. I liked their first album so I have high hopes for their second shot and I wasn't disappointed. This was nostalgic to me because I dance to this whenever I clean up my stuff in the room that my sister, Cha and I share. The cleaning part is so rare but the dancing comes in more often. Whatever, it makes me feel good despite the fact that I dance like a crippled dog.

3. LFO - Girl On TV

LFO, which stands for Lyte Funkie Ones, became my favorite boyband during the late 90's because of this song. This song is my most favorite among all of their songs and it's the reason why I bought their first album...in cassette format, which I still have up to this day. I remember at that time, Jennifer Love Hewitt's career was flying off the hook so I wasn't surprised that she was chosen to be the lead in this video. The reason why this song is memorable because the popularity of this song among my male classmates and my possession of the LFO album helped me to become as "one of the boys". It was an achievement for a socially awkward female transfer student during the formative years of adolescence, in which talking to strange boys could kill in an instant. LOL.

2. Boyzone - Isn't It A Wonder

The cool thing about boybands is that they can get away with matchy-matchy outfits and each member can still stand out in it. Take this example from the Irish boyband, Boyzone, who wore white tops with casual bottoms while cruising the dirt road to some town in a far off place. Ang gagwapo nilang lahat dito. Plus points for Keith Duffy for the motorcycle. But what the heck, I was in love with Ronan Keating. Hahaha. This is nostalgic to me because I was playing this song on the same day I heard the news that Stephen Gately died. </3

Why The Bangs?

A couple of months ago, I got bored with my hair and decided to get full bangs again. A lot of my friends and classmates asked me what was the reason behind why I suddenly got the fringe. I often say that it is K-pop inspired but the real reason behind it is to cover the nasty poknat on my hairline that was the result of changing my hair part from the center to the side.

Observe:

Me no gusta!

Not to mention, I look washed out so I need something to make me look fresh and youthful. Lels. So I thought about my old pre-school photos and the Korean actresses I often see so I decided to snip my hair and voila!

Seems legit

Although the eyebags ruin the supposed "freshness" and "youthfulness", I must say that:

Whenever I pin it up, people would comment, "O, nasaan na ang bangs mo?". So now, I'm not sure if it has been my trademark or my bangs just began to have a life of their own. Mrhrhr. But since I can feel the raging inferno of IM, I'm going to grow it out for the time being. Anyway, the poknat has been reduced to a favorable size so it'll do for now.

Ang Kwento ni Mang Abe

Random musings from my April 1, 2007 post. I was angsty during these times but I still hold on to some parts this little belief of mine. :)

Recently, I chanced upon my older sister’s mementos and memorabilia from the past. I laughed my ass of when I saw the flyer for the children’s theatrical play, “Ang Kwento Ni Mang Abe”. See the illustration above...cool! Seeing that brought back so many memories and many other things such as dust bunnies and old notes from way back.

I just wondered why have they stopped producing or funding these kinds of shows? I know that they know that a lot would benefit from these kinds of projects. Great. Just great! Where were these shows when the world needs good manners and early exposure that learning is fun?

Looking back shows like Batibot and Sesame Street has been my own virtual textbook. I learned my ABC’s and my 123’s in these shows. Not only that, I learned other day to day skills such as tying my shoelaces (c/o Robert Jaworski) and cleaning up after my mess (c/o Kuya Bodjie). I strengthened some of my values like saying po and opo to elders. Who can forget the magic words: sorry, thank you, and please?

But now, children has become a little bit of annoying. They don’t even know how to say sorry. Just a little while ago this morning when I attended the Palm Sunday Mass, a kid aged about 6 y/o wearing those annoying skate shoes stepped on my toe. I yelped in pain but the child didn't even bother to say sorry. If that person wasn't a kid, I’d probably turn into a Ms. Hyde. I’d intentionally step (or probably trample) on her foot while saying, “Sorry, jackass!”

(Edit: OKAY. Nowadays I won't intentionally step on other people's toes and say "Sorry, jackass!" HAHA.)

I’m not saying that I’m the epitome of a perfect, polite child. All I am saying is that we should still remember these things because it’d make us better persons. Although it might sound so passé, it really does. Usually, polite people are more pleasant to be with than those who are not.

And as for me, nowadays I’m being polite when the situation calls for it…in situations like when the person in front of me is a polite one.

(Edit: In short, kung magalang ka, igagalang din kita pero kung bastos ka, pwedeng deadmahin lang kita o babarahin kita. Mapagpatol! Haha.)

Fabuland is Love!

Taken from my June 26, 2012 entry.

I was inspired by my Ate Richie's blog entry to write about our old LEGO Fabuland set. It was one of our favorite toys ever because we get to build our own house according to our own specifications. Not only that, it is also our way of bonding because my siblings and I huddle together in a corner, trying to follow the instructions on the leaflet.

I found this amazing review by WhiteFang and I got all the photos there. WhiteFang's photos make storytelling easier. :)

The Fabuland 3683

The earliest memory that I have with our LEGO Fabuland set is when Daddy came home from Europe and he was building it with Ate Richie. And I remember that my favorite role was to spin the Ferris Wheel and the Merry-go-Round.

This image is found in the inside flap of the box

I wanted to have all of the characters found on the 2nd to the last page of the leaflet

Let me take you to a short journey back to my childhood. Meet Max the Mouse, Freddie the Fox, Clive the Crocodile and Lucy the Lamb: